Rugby fanatic or what?

Man said to wife

"Right you sexy thing, upstairs now"

She looked at him and said:

"Ooh, you kinky bastard"

He said "No, seriously, the rugby's starting, now f*#k off'


Exceptional moment, lol. ROTFLMAO!!!

Paddy

Paddy needed money. He went to playground, grabbed a kid, and said, “I’ve kidnapped u."
He wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped ur kid.Tomorrow,put £10,000 in a bag put it by the tree in the playground. Signed, Irishman."

He then pinned the note to the kid and sent him home.

The next morning paddy checked. A paper bag was there with the £10,000 inside, with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Irishman?"

The State trooper and the speeder

I got this joke from someone who likes to read my blog/jokes. Thanks Anonymous! Enjoy people!

A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership.

Taking off down the road, he pushed it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-75, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a Florida State Trooper, blue lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this!" and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the trooper got out of his vehicle and walked up to the Corvette. He looked at his watch, then said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a new reason for speeding--a reason I've never before heard--I'll let you go."


The old gentleman paused then said: "Three years ago, my wife ran off with a State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."

"Have a good day, Sir," replied the trooper.