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Monday, May 7, 2007

few jokes.

A Lesson of Anatomy.

The body builder takes off his shirt and the blonde says, "What a great chest you have."He tells her, "That's 100 lbs. of dynamite, baby."

He takes off his pants and the blonde says,"What massive calves you have." The body builder tells her,"That's 100 lbs. of dynamite, baby."

He then removes his underwear and the blonde goes running out of the apartment screaming in fear.

The body builder puts his clothes back on and chases after her. He catches up to her and asks why she ran out of the apartment like that.

The blonde replies, "I was afraid to be around all that dynamite when I saw how short the fuse was!"
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Tony you are so good so I need to ask you an extra question.
- There are 5 birds in a tree, you have a gun and shoot one, how many will
there be left?

- None answer Tony.
- What you mean....none?
- Well The one I shoot falls to the ground dead the other fly away scared.
The teachers nods but had the answer 4 in her mind.
- Well the answer should be 4 but I like the way you thinks, she says.

Later to stretch his hand.
- Yes Tony?
- Miss, can I ask a question?
- Of course.
- Alright, 3 ladies are eating ice creams. One of them licks it, the other
bites it and the third sucks it. Who of them are married?

The teache blushes:
- ehh hmmm.. I'm not sure but I guess it's the one who sucks on the ice
cream.
- No Miss. It is the one wearing a ring on her finger, BUT I like the way
you thinks!!!
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An 80 year old man was having his annual check up and the doctor asked him how he was feeling.
"I've never been better!" he boasted. "I've got an eighteen year old bride who's pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?"
The doctor considered this for a moment, then said,"Let me tell you a story.

I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day went out in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun.
So he was in the woods and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him!
He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle, and do you know what happened?" the doctor queried.
Dumbfounded, the old man replied "No."
The doctor continued, "The bear dropped dead in front of him!"
"That's impossible!" exclaimed the old man. "Someone else must have shot that bear."
"That's kind of what I'm getting at..." replied the doctor.
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Blonde Joke.
A blonde goes into a library and says to the librarian,"please can i have 1 cup of coffee with milk and sugar in it, 1 brownie, and 2 doughnuts?
The Librarian looks at the blonde and says "excuse me madam, but this is a library".
The blonde looks around and says "oh i am sorry", and whispers to the librarian, please can i have 1 cup of coffee with milk and sugar in it,1 brownie and 2 doughnuts.
More jokes later,i need to go to a client's site.

7 comments:

Stevo said...

When it finally calmed down at work you left office and with only two storys No I don't have you and no more stories ;o)

Stevo said...

Now not no of course :o)

dairy of a G said...

haha
Girl you "got jokes"
Just checking you out

Vera Ikeji said...

I am still working on the jokes. Couldnt add more cos i had to do some office work.Now that i am home i am too tired to add more.Will do so as soon as i can.
Thanks for checking out my blog.

kay jay said...

u really amaze me with your updates. i have been reading your blog for a while now and would love to learn how you created one.friends in the U.S created a myspace thing but its unlike this,pls u can email details of creating blogs as well as updating to kunlejuba@yahoo.com.thanx and have a stress-free week

just some girl said...

Just out jumping around and land here. Thanks for the laughs!

Vera Ikeji said...

@ Kunle of course i will. And thx for stopping by my blog.
@ Just some girl, Thanks.